It’s been so long since I’ve had the time and energy to write anything. Growing into toddlerhood has been more than a challenge. Motherhood is apparantly not for the faint hearted. I didnt think of myself as a whiny Eeyore but there you have it. I have whined and wined and crying big ugly cries. I was not ready. For a baby, for babies, for leaving the hospital with children. Most people leave with one child and I had two.
Struggling isn’t pretty and I have managed to make it look even worse. The good news…if there is any. 😂😂😂 My twins are resilient. Most children are. Thankfully my crazy isn’t rubbing off on them, yet.
It took so long to decide to look at the symptoms. Mild to deep depression. Fits of anger at the smallest spill of water or milk. I mean it’s not like they come out of the womb knowing what to do. Literally, they know nothing. They know how to breath and cry. That’s it. Just a psa incase you are wondering.
I have and have been suffering from postpartum depression. I have been looking back and so many times I thought about getting helped. Unfortunately I convinced myself to get 30 mins to myself, courtesy of my sister or brother in law and take a break and suck it up. Some wine and dinner of my own and boom I felt better. That though is not a long term solution. I finally, through a great friends urging, made an appointment and will be working on getting me healthy very soon.
I’m glad for friends who take their time to care for me. In turn I have to also care for all my friends to actually talk to them and let them in on my hurts. So many times I can shut down, be my easily introverted self and that does me no good. Talking it out does help and it allows others to give what can be great advice as they have insight into different parts of you, past and present.
Speak up! Take the time to speak up. Do not suffer in silence, not when there is so much help around.